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User:Deathbunny
Introduction
Deathbunny (DB) is a midlife college student pursuing a bachelor's degree in Psychology with minors in Anthropology and Biology. His dream job is to study human behavior and extrapolate future trends from the perspectives of Evolutionary Psychology and Physical Anthropology. (Or become a novelist who writes scientific articles on the side.)
In his daily life he is a simple, somewhat lazy ("efficient") college student who is perpetually in search of a better part-time job until such time he moves into a career.
DB's other interests include the design of and use of small arms, science fiction, writing science fiction, and adding to his extensive collection of semi-obscure books, magazines, and pamphlets for later use "in his writing." He also cogitates much and often on one or more of his pet theories and potential plot lines for fiction.
His one (current) claim to online immortality is being quoted by Salon.com in an article on Danial Jackson of Stargate fame as saying "You miss his appeal. From listening to the female-types around here, he has one of the most appealing of attributes in a non-significant-other person: A cute guy that needs mothering. Because of it, he's a babe-magnet and therefore it's taboo to rag on him." * [1].
Family History
Deathbunny is a bastard from a long line of bastardry whose recent antecedents have dodged the genetic bullets of Marfan's syndrome, insanity, respiratory problems, and flat feet to grant DB and his children with Scottish surnames and no major health issues except a tendency to be heavy and a bit nearsighted. Considering the heritability of sociosexuality, it's probably no wonder he's got multiple children.
Youth
Deathbunny was born and raised in Phoenix, Arizona and was a lackluster student as a child and teen being bored easily and graduating high school after 5 years with a 1.97 GPA after averaging in "honor points" for advanced courses such as AP Calculus, AP Physics, and computer programming. Somehow he managed to fail almost every elective attempted and the first two years of high school English except Junior ROTC and a single semester Psychology elective. Notable failures included drafting, beginning art, electronics, typing/keyboarding, and an elective entitiled "Outdoor Adventure".
Two key factors to this apparent sign of stupidity was a mother who liked to compare her childrens' progress out loud as a means of "motivation" and an inability to be enthused by anything other than challenging or intersting material. When taken with DB's philosophy of fighting only winning battles when possible, DB's total lack of competitiveness in the high school academic field is quite understandable.
Military Service
Deathbunny served both in the Arizona Army National Guard--enlisting at age 17 and attending US Army Basic Combat Training while in high school--and the US Army with a total length of service of 7 years and 8 months. Promoted exactly once, from Private First Class to Specialist, his service was characterized by an excellence in his mission performance and a lack of effort in uniform wear and appearance that, nonetheless, resulted in his attendance of the US Army Primary Leadership Development Course and several awards including 3 Letters of Achievement from LTC's and above, two Army Achievement Medals, A Good Conduct Medal, and the prestigious Expert Field Medical Badge along with the noteriety of being the only line medic in his unit(s) to qualify with the M9 Pistol, M16A1, M16A2, M249 SAW, M60 GPMG, M203 GL, Hand Grenades, and fire (in training) the 155mm Howitzer, M2HB HMG, MK19 Mod 3 GMG, M220-series TOW missile, M136 AT4 MAW, and the M72A2 LAW. (Almost all while pulling range coverage.)
Despite being assigned to the 24th Infantry Division (Mechanized) while it was part of the XVIII Airborne Corps for a number of years, the only foriegn country Deathbunny has thus far been to has been flying over a corner of Canada to get to Alaska.
Alerted many times and never deployed, Deathbunny's combat experience is nil beyond training and reading a good book. Instead, he is very attentive to combat vets for their opinions on such subjects and does not try to portray himself as an expert on such things.
Occasionally, he continues to flirt with the idea of reenlisting for a few years for the nebulous purpose of "paying student loans" and "finishing something he wasn't done with yet."
College
Deathbunny started college twice.
First, immediately after graduating high school, he attended a trade school to learn PC repair. Dropping out because his girlfriend at the time was putting out a lot and realizing that, despite being interested in computer programming and system architecture, he wasn't interested in being a test-discard-replace jockey for life, DB ceased attending school to go into the Army.
Since then, the trade school went under, disappeared, and--beyond $2000 in student loans--allows DB to deny any knowledge of said excursion into collegiate education.
Deathbunny earned an Associate in Science degree with distinction from a local community college and is currently a student at Arizona State University West Campus pursuing a Bachelor's of Science in Psychology and Arizona State University Main Campus pursuing a minors in Biological Sciences and Anthropology because he sucks at foreign languages.
After completing his undergraduate education he intends on applying for graduate school either in the field of Evolutionary psychology, Behavioral ecology, or Physical anthropology.
Career
Beyond the military, Deathbunny's primary work has been in the field of termite control where he gained a reputation as a very knowledgeable individual, problem solver, and a damned good person to send to pissed off customers' homes. The last trait due to his ability to empathize, listen to the client's issues, and then address the problem, educate the client, or to direct the client to someone who is able to do so.
He has additional experience in the fields of medical or veterinary office support.
Children
Deathbunny has three of his own, all very intelligent and ably supported in their pursuit of knowledge.