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Hot Dogs, Horseshoes & Hand Grenades/Unusable/NPC Weapons

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Unusable/NPC Weapons

Several weapons in-game are featured solely as static images (for demonstration or decorative purposes); several other, more cartoonish-looking weapons are used by enemies such as Soldier Weinerbots (SWBs for short) and Sosigs. These so-called "Sosigguns" can be wielded by the player, but to reload an empty Sosiggun, the player must shake the gun until they hear a "DING!", since they purposefully lack the same complex interactions as the game's other firearms. All Sosigguns fire tracer rounds, which help make up for the gun's lack of useable iron sights, and help the player more easily identify incoming enemy fire.

AKM

As mentioned, the 10th alpha of Update #52 added the AKM to the arsenals of SWBs.

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AKM - 7.62x39mm
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Reaching for a Sosig's AKM...
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...snatching it...
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...and unloading it into its former owner, sending out a shower of mustard and meat chunks in the process.
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Examining the stubby AKM. Note that it uses early-pattern "slab-side" magazines, presumably in order to maintain a low poly-count.
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A group of Sosigs investigating the source of a gunshot (said source being the person taking the picture), the one in the middle giving a good view of the right side of its AKM; note the charging handle and the corresponding slot in the receiver.
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"Aiming" the low-poly rifle; the fact that both the front and rear sights are large, solid blocks doesn't exactly help in this regard.
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The updated model of the Sosigs' AKM. Not a whole lot has changed here, but the weapon notably does have Bakelite-styled magazines instead of the prior slab-sides, along with an AK-74-esque stock divot.

AN/M14 Incendiary Grenade

The headline feature of Update #70's 3rd alpha was the addition of Sosig-usable hand grenades; among these was a grenade with no player-usable equivalent (barring Molotov cocktails), an AN/M14 incendiary grenade.

AN/M14 incendiary grenade (with later-pattern body & markings)
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The Sosig-used M14 grenade in one of the Proving Grounds' testing rooms...
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...and, suddenly, in the middle of a gunfight in the same scene's arena, right as the pin comes out.
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After recovering from the shock of this sudden temporal pilgrimage, Billy comes to his senses and throws the now-armed grenade at a hostile Sosig.
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This creates a brilliant explosion of flames...
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...followed by a residual fire that's probably not supposed to be floating. So it goes.

Benelli M4 Super 90

The Benelli M4 Super 90 is featured as an example for a semi-automatic shotgun on the item spawner's instruction panel.

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Benelli M4 Super 90 - 12 gauge

Beretta 92FS

While not directly usable in-game, a Beretta 92FS (different from the M9A1 in-game) is seen on the item spawner's instruction panel as an example handgun, showing off some standard controls and functions. A 92FS in Sosiggun form was added on Update #99.

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Beretta 92FS - 9x19mm Parabellum
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The Beretta on the instruction panel.
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Sneaking up on an unsuspecting guard and stealing his Beretta, being sure to hold the other one on him in case he tries anything funny. Flaccid Steak starts out with nothing but some healing items and a rangefinder, so this is usually how he gets his first weapons.
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Examining both Berettas, the guard still completely unaware.
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Aiming at nothing in particular; the attentive may notice that this is the same room as above, sans the guards. 3 guesses what happened to them.
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Teaching another Sosig precisely how not to go around a corner.
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More of the same creates an empty magazine, and a locked-open slide to let you know. Discard at will.

Browning M1917

Update #77 added two new sets of Sosigguns, a "Western"-themed set and a "mid-century" set; the heaviest weapon in the latter set was a Browning M1917 machine gun, implemented before a player-usable version was made available.

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Browning M1917 - .30-06 Springfield
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A table covered in Update #77's Sosigguns; the comically-proportioned Browning is visible to the right.
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A better look at the M1917s in the Take & Hold final score room; the plan was to take this shot in one of the actual hold rooms after completing a hold, but counting to 5 is hard.
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Pointing the machine guns in the worst possible direction, and looking at their slightly-protruding barrels.
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Aiming one of the Brownings at a wall; there's no front sight post in the protector, nor is there a rear sight notch in the leaf, so it's more or less used like a crude set of ghost-ring irons.
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Of course, with a tracer-filled machine gun, the instinct is to just walk your shots onto their target...
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...but, since most Sosigguns start out partly empty as a balancing measure, this doesn't tend to produce much beyond a couple of locked-open machine guns.

"Bullpov"

One of the five community-designed Sosigguns, the Bullpov is a DMR (Designated Markswiener Rifle) that appears to take inspiration from the Bren (with its top-mounted magazine and offset sights) and the Dragunov SVU (with its bullpup layout and characteristic curved 10-round 7.62x54mmR magazine) - it is, in effect, an upside-down SVU, with the name seemingly alluding to this fact (i.e. Bullpup Dragunov).

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Bren Mk. II - .303 British
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Dragunov SVU - 7.62x54mmR
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The Bullpov's original concept; interestingly, this was made in-game, using a variety of attachments (including a backwards Mosin-Nagant PU scope, several wrap-around pistol sight rails, and a KRISS Vector CRB's barrel shroud), all attached to a Thompson Center Arms Contender. The power of the game's mod system is not to be underestimated...
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The finalized version of the Bullpov, above the exact same table.
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It looks a fair bit more like it was meant to be this way (instead of being cobbled together from a series of unrelated objects), though it still retains several clear attributes of the original design - the stock, barrel shroud, foregrip, and clearly-separate pistol grip/trigger group were all retained in one form or another, while the set of pistol rails was turned into a solid receiver, complete with the original's angled ends.
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Aiming the Bullpov; while the original version used a backwards PU scope, the final version instead uses Bren-style offset irons, presumably to preserve performance when the weapon is used on a large scale (as scopes are rather complex and performance-intensive).
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Blasting a Sosig with a 7.62x54mmR tracer. Note that the charging handle has moved; the original design was said to be pump-action (with another screenshot showing the foregrip pulled back to the end of its rail), but the in-game version is an autoloader.
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A great deal of designated marksweinering later, the Bullpov locks open.

Colt 1851 Navy

Among the former set was a Colt 1851 Navy revolver; like the Browning, it was released before a player-usable counterpart.

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Colt 1851 Navy - .36 ball
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The conspicuously brown Colt Navy. Note the shortened barrel; this is, again, just part of the stylizing process, but does bare a distinct resemblance to the shorter-barreled "US Marshal" variant of the 1851 Navy.
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Holding a pair of the bronze-colored revolvers; while they're largely symmetrical, the cut-out in the recoil shield is correctly right-side-only.
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Blasting a wall; like the other Sosig revolvers, there's no obvious indication of when they're empty, so using one is always a bit of a gamble.

Colt M1911A1

Among the "mid-century" set of Sosigguns added in Update #77 was a Colt M1911A1.

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Colt M1911A1 - .45 ACP
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A Sosig-issued M1911A1. The stubby slide and barrel, while simply part of the stylizing process used for the creation of Sosigguns, gives the weapon a resemblance to certain modern compact derivates, such as the Kimber Super Carry.
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Oh, and the missing trigger is deliberate this time. Again, that's just the way that Sosigguns are.
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Aiming at a wall; the sights are largely similar to the real deal (if a bit too rounded), and surprisingly usable to boot.
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Continuing to aim (this time with the right eye), and ensuring that a Sosig will never be able to do so again.
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7 rounds of ensurance later, and what was once a gun is now a doorstop.

Colt Model 1903 Pocket Hammerless

Another one of Update #77's "mid-century" Sosigguns was a Colt Model 1903 Pocket Hammerless, one of several of these weapons released before the existence of a player-usable counterpart.

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Colt Model 1903 Pocket Hammerless - .32 ACP
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Examining a pair of the Sosig-wielded Model 1903s.
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The M1903 is one of the only Sosigguns not to be made substantially smaller, in large part due to it being a pocket gun to begin with.
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Pointing one of the pistols at a wall; they lack sights of any sort, so it's point shooting or nothing.
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As such, dual-wielding isn't quite as ridiculous a tactic as it otherwise would be.
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Especially since, when you're using .32 pistols that typically have 5 rounds in them tops, you'll need every shot you can get.

Colt Model 607

The final weapon made available to the SWBs in Update #46 was most likely intended as a cartoonish M16A1, with the resultant weapon resembling a Colt Model 607.

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M16A1 with 20-round magazine - 5.56x45mm NATO
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Colt Model 607 with 20-round magazine - 5.56x45mm NATO
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A now-headless bot dropping to the floor, somehow still keeping a grip on its Model 607; this is made doubly strange by the fact that they don't even have hands to grip their guns with in the first place (a fact which, according to one of their voice lines, they are actually aware of).
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Another bot "meating" a similar end. Fun fact: you can't tell for sure if this gun is facing towards or away from the camera. And now you can never unsee that.
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To help take your mind off of your newfound hatred of me, here's a picture of a camouflaged Sosig with a 607 slung over its... well, you can't call it a shoulder, because they don't have arms, so... y'know what, let's just say that the Sosig's carrying it. That seems like a solid plan.
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Grabbing the Sosig's 607...
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...before wasting all of its ammo on the floor.
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Examining the now-empty rifle.
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A far more heavily-armored Sosig helpfully showing off the other side of its rifle. While it's presumably just a result of the rifle's deliberately low-poly modeling (especially since it's indexed in the spawning menu as "M16"), the shortened stock, exposed-barrel-to-handguard ratio, and slickside upper receiver (complete with modeled ejection port) help further peg it as a Model 607.
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Blasting away an enemy, with the rebuilt tracer effects creating a spectacular lightshow; note that the 607 lacks a rear sight.
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The updated model of the 607 brings with it the rather curious choice of a handguard with grasping serrations rather like those of an M16A2; it also has space in the lower receiver for a magazine release, but not the actual magazine release itself.
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A dropped 607 fitted with a suppressor, as used by some of the Pacification Squad enemies.
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The laser on this particular firearm seems to spontaneously emanate from either the front sight or the gas block.

Colt Python

The 3rd alpha build of Update #70 added a few new options for Sosigs, one of which being a snub-nosed .357 Magnum revolver resembling a Colt Python.

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Colt Python with 2.5-inch barrel - .357 Magnum
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Examining the right side of the cartoonish-looking snubnose...
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...and the left. There doesn't seem to be a cylinder release, though to be fair, this at least lines up with how it works in-game.
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Firing a few .357 tracers into the floor.
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As above, but this time actually attempting to hit something other than the floor.

Colt Single Action Army

Another member of the Western Sosiggun set in Update #77 was a Colt Single Action Army. Prior to its inclusion as both a regular firearm, and a Sosiggun two of them were featured on the "Amendment 35" poster in the indoor range. A 7.5" "Cavalry" model appears as an example for a single-action revolver on the item spawner's instruction panel.

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Colt Single Action Army with 4.75-inch barrel - .45 Long Colt
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The shortened, stylized SAA, rather resembling a 4 3/4"-barreled "Quickdraw" model (albeit with an obviously shorter barrel).
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A brace of SAAs, showing off some of the details.
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Attempting to aim; while the sights modeled into the weapon are rather clear, the hammer has other ideas. Such things tend to happen when a weapon physically designed to be single-action only is treated as double-action.
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All the more reason to go full desperado, and not even bother trying to aim.
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Speaking of reasons to not bother aiming properly, the fact that the Proving Ground scene allows for the spawn-locking of Sosigguns is as good a reason as any - you can't reload them, but you can always just grab more.
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Having successfully vanquished Revolver Saucelot during a hold, Flaccid Steak notices his new-looking gun, and immediately takes interest.
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Of course, the problem with killing a boss before the hold phase actually ends is that another one shows up almost immediately.
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Using the weapon against a boss in this fashion is not recommended; even if you can overcome the lack of usable sights, and get lucky enough to wind up with a fully-loaded cylinder, the bosses' exceptional resilience puts paid to any claim about 6 rounds being enough.
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Having failed to stop his approach with his own revolver, Steak tries instead to stop him with his own revolver.
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This likewise proves unsuccessful.
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Somehow completing the fight without dying, Steak inspects his prizes; they're really just the standard Sosig SAA with a different texture. Still neat, though.
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The Amendment 35 poster, as it appears in the indoor range, revolver-wielding eagle and all. The eagle appears to be a parody of the Great Seal of the United States.
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A clearer image of the poster, taken from the official RUST LTD website.

CZ 75 Compact

One of the promotional signs in the Sampler Platter features a CZ 75 Compact sitting atop some vegetables.

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CZ 75 D Compact - 9x19mm Parabellum
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The Sampler Platter sign in question. Note that the pistol in this image appears to be reversed as the ejection port cutout and extractor can be partially seen.

Diemaco C7A1

As part of a running joke among the game's community, the notion of a Diemaco C7A1 was added on Meatmas Day 2023; the rifle itself, however, was not, with only a Canadian-issue Thermold magazine connecting it to the physical plane.

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Diemaco C7A1 with ELCAN scope - 5.56x45mm NATO
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So no, in case you were wondering, your game wasn't bugged. There wasn't any issue with the gun not rendering correctly, or spawning a couple millimeters too low and clipping through the box into another dimension, or any other such plausible explanations. Instead, this was little more than an act of tomfoolery.
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At least the magazine's real - Hell, it even works, as long as you don't try to take it out of this specific scene. (For context: "Aaron" refers to a particular individual who had, prior to this, left a comment on practically every single devlog for the past couple of years that somehow segued into a request for the C7A1 and C7A2. This joke would seem a bit cruel, if not for the fact that "maybe" in this case means "definitely" - by that point, it was generally acknowledged that the C7s were on the list for the long-planned 2023 AR-15 family reboot.)

"Desert Vulture"

One of the five community-designed Sosigguns added in the first alpha of Update #97, the Desert Vulture is a PDW that's loosely based on the 10"-barreled version of the Desert Eagle, with a Sa vz. 61 Skorpion-esque stock and overall layout, a MAC-10-esque charging handle, and a folding foregrip.

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Magnum Research Desert Eagle Mark XIX with 10" barrel - .44 Magnum
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Sa vz. 61 Škorpion with 10-round magazine and stock extended - .32 ACP
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The Desert Vulture's original concept drawing, for reference.
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And here's the real steel. Well, virtually-real, at any rate.
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The "steel" bit still stands; the community-created Sosigguns were given more detailed textures than the regular ones, featuring multiple distinct materials. Also note the ambidextrous fire selector; assuming that the markings mean what they do on the original drawing, then the safety is on.
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Aiming; the rear sight is simply a cutout in the charging handle, akin to early Thompson prototypes. The sights are slightly misaligned here, to show off the front sight; there appears to be a stray bit of model geometry blocking up the rear sight notch.
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Firing a few rounds; note that what would be the barrel on a normal Desert Eagle is now the slide, since the "slide" on the Vulture is a fixed part of the receiver.
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Even with its relatively tame fire rate, the Vulture's 14-round magazine doesn't last very long.
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Doing some "bandit shooting" with the Desert Vulture; the weapon's heavy recoil and aforementioned fire rate make the odds of actually hitting anything rather low, but when a round of .50 AE hits, it hits.

Dragunov SVDS

While "added" in Update #102, a new set of Sosiguns was actually made accessible (i.e. spawnable) in Update #104; these were generally patterned after Escape from Tarkov, with one being an SVDS Dragunov.

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Dragunov SVDS - 7.62x54mmR
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Looking over the Sosig SVDS; unlike most of the Sosiguns with folding/collapsible stocks, this one's still extended.
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Instead, most of the length has been taken out of the front end, with the handguard cut down to just 3 vents, and the barrel shortened almost to the end of the gas block (rather like an SVU Dragunov).
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Aiming; oddly enough for a precision-oriented weapon, it doesn't have a proper set of irons, with the actual front sight post missing from its hood. To be fair, "precise" is a relative term when it comes to dealing with Sosiguns.
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Additionally, as one would expect for such a weapon post-recoil-rework, it's rather... jumpy, to say the least.
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Once all 10 rounds are expended, the SVDS locks open on empty; this is one of the cases where its behavior aligns with its real-steel counterpart - at least, it would, if not for the fact that the safety's on.

FAMAS F1

A Sosiggun variation of the FAMAS F1 was added on Update #99.

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FAMAS F1 - 5.56x45mm NATO
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Repeating the procedure seen in the 92FS section above, and grabbing a clueless Sosig's FAMAS, with another at the ready just in case.
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And, just like that section, the next step is to pause and inspect both guns, with no regard for the guard standing within spitting distance. Granted, it's not as bad an idea here as it was there; both sections feature the same Sosig, so he now has neither a Beretta nor a FAMAS to attack with.
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Aiming at nothing in particular with much the same; like the Colt above, the carrying handle is empty, leaving nothing but an empty gutter to aim through.
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So, you might as well just dual-wield.
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Once dry, the FAMAS locks open. Note that the stock apparently wasn't designed for a reciprocating bolt, causing it to clip through the buttplate when it moves back; this also shows that the bolt is little more than a two-dimensional cover plate.

FN F2000

Added in Update #85's first alpha, the FN F2000 is only available as a Sosiggun; as mentioned in the rifle's section back on the assault rifle sub-page, this will likely remain the case, as head developer Anton Hand has a strong distate for the rifle, and has stated on multiple occasions that it will never be available in-game.

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FN F2000 - 5.56x45mm NATO
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The Sosiggun F2000 sitting on a - my God, what happened to you!?
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Oh, you're just not entirely physical. Nevermind.
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Aside from some collision geometry, the Sosig F2000 is also missing a magazine...
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...and a hole in the integrated scope. Fun stuff.
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Shredding a Sosig with the F2000; it has an astounding rate of fire, though this does mean that it runs empty at rather inopportune times.
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As with most of the Sosigguns, the F2000's reciprocating charging component (in this case, the charging handle, which is correct) locks open on an empty magazine (which isn't correct for a real F2000 - not that this one is trying to be), so as to provide some means of determining when the rifle is empty.

FN M240

The derelict M1 Abrams tanks and M2 Bradley IFVs scattered throughout the Winter Wasteland map (added in the 2020 Meatmas event, which spanned the first 25 days of December), while somewhat low-poly, still have visible mounting hardware for their FN M240C and M240D machine guns.

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FN M240C - 7.62x51mm NATO
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FN M240D - 7.62x51mm NATO
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A partly-buried Bradley near the spawn area, showing its coaxial M240C (next to the main gun).
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Just ahead of it lies an Abrams in a similarly sorry state, with another coaxial 240C right next to its M256 L/44 120mm cannon. Which, attentive viewers will note, the cameraman is currently straddling.

FN P90

Added concurrently with the F2000 above, the Sosigs have access to the FN P90; unlike the player-usable version, this is an original P90 with an integrated red-dot sight, not a P90 TR.

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FN P90 - 5.7x28mm
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As above, but somewhat squashed.
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Oh, and the charging handle on this side is just kinda... gone.
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Since the integrated reflex sight doesn't work, you might as well just fire it gangster-style, right?
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Certainly not hearing any complaints from him.
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Once empty, the Sosiggun P90's single charging handle locks to the rear, hopefully preventing a potentially rather frustrating death.

Franchi SPAS-12

With the release of "Welldone Freemeat" as a Take & Hold character came Half-Life 2-inspired Sosigs, complete with their iconic Franchi SPAS-12s; the ones in-game seem to be the short-barreled version with a folding stock, rather than the full-length models seen in the Half-Life games and available to the player, though this could just be another artifact of their stylized appearance.

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Franchi SPAS-12 with short barrel - 12 gauge
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Having pilfered an enemy SPAS, Freemeat, inspects his prize.
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The weapon's other side; despite lacking a charging handle (and operating exclusively in pump-action), the Sosiggun SPAS's ejection port still has the cutout for one.
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Notably, this variant of the SPAS lacks any form of sights, not that they'd be useful since the stock is folded (and, unlike many games, H3 understands that the buttplate is a solid object); this already unsuccessful attempt at aiming is then further spoiled by the sudden appearance of a fast-type Breadcrab Zosig.
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Blasting the offending individual with a load of tracer buckshot.
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A few more instances of the above action leave the shotgun empty. Time to let the real deal get to work.

Gatling Gun

Perhaps the most significantly-shortened Sosiggun (compared to its normally-proportioned counterpart), a miniaturized Gatling Gun (reminiscent of the player-usable "Hand Crank Frank" variant in-game) was made available to Sosigs in Update #77, as part of its Western-themed set.

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British M1865 Gatling Gun with hopper feed setup - .50-70 Government
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Taking a close look at the Gatling. Maybe if you soak it in warm water for a few hours, it'll grow to its full size.
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The other side is largely identical, save for what appears to be a functionless, solid ejection chute.
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Flipping it over on a different axis reveals that, one-upping the 10-barreled reference image, the Sosig Gatling has an impressive twelve barrels.
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Aiming at a Sosig; while it lacks sights, the "window" between the weapon's receiver and (never-used) top-mounted chainsaw grip can be used as an ersatz sight, with rounds impacting roughly in the middle.
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Alternatively, just stick to close quarters and point-shoot the thing.
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Dual-wielding the Gatlings, in true old-school FPS fashion.

Glock 19

A compact-sized Glock akin to the Glock 19 (albeit with a Glock 26-length barrel and slide) was made available to SWBs (Soldier Weiner-Bots) in Update #46, although according to its Sosiggun spawn-menu name, it is apparently meant as a cartoonish Glock 17.

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Glock 19 - 9x19mm Parabellum
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A Weinerbot ambles into an objective room...
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...and is promptly greeted with an axe to the face. If you can really call the featureless front of a Weinerbot's head a "face".
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With the release of Update #59's second alpha build, the bots' Glock was made into a new type of object - a so-called "Sosiggun" (so named because the new enemy that wields them is known as the "Sosig").
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Their simplistic (yet somewhat surprisingly detailed) model reflects the simplistic nature of their use - the only thing that the player can do with one of these is to fire it until it runs dry, with actions like slide-racking and reloading being entirely impossible. This is largely in the interest of performance; were enemies to wield fully-detailed weapons with full sets of interactions, the user's computer would very quickly begin to smell of smoke.
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Still, in spite of this, there is at least one detail worth noting:
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Despite, again, being extremely simplistic models with only one possible point of interaction, these weapons still have reciprocating slides.
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Furthermore, the enemies' weapons' newfound physicality gives the player the ability to rip a Sosig's weapon right out of its nonexistent hands...
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...and either throw it clear across the room...
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...or simply shoot the Sosig in the "face" with it.
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A paranoid Sosig firing its Glock at another's corpse. This was caused by a bug in Update #59's early alpha builds; spawning the Sosigs, enabling wander/fight behavior, and setting them to different IFFs with dead Sosigs already present would cause the live Sosigs to identify the dead ones as threats.
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Drawing a bead on an enemy Sosig with the Glock's surprisingly workable sights.
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Following the eighth alpha build of Update #59, the Sosigguns were updated with new models and textures, generally making them look less like untextured raw models from early-mid 2000s third-person shooter games, and more like toys made of rubberized plastic, so as to better fit the aesthetic of the Sosigs themselves. This particular Glock is fitted with an equally-cartoonish suppressor, which does far more to muffle the gun's report than its size and muzzle flash would lead one to believe.

Heckler & Koch MP5SD1

The only strictly-dedicated suppressed weapon usable by enemies, the Heckler & Koch MP5SD1 was initially not a player-usable weapon (bar its limited functionality as a "Sosiggun"), though it was later included as one of the 28 different MP5 variants added in Update #63.

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Heckler & Koch MP5SD1 - 9x19mm Parabellum
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A Sosig carrying an MP5SD1. Unlike many of their other weapons, the MP5 seemingly lacks a trigger guard.
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An MP5SD1 on the ground...
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...and another one hovering ominously next to a Sosig.
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The enemy firing its MP5SD1; in spite of the suppressor, it still produces a full-sized muzzle flash.
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Returning fire at another Sosig with the now-captured MP5SD1. Note the ejection port; this contains a bolt that visibly reciprocates when the weapon is fired. Also note the object at the weapon's front end, which appears to be either a somewhat stretched-out front sight hood without an actual sight, or possibly (though less likelily) a Truglo-esque red-dot sight.
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The updated MP5SD1, complete with ribbed handguard, non-solid front sight protector, and trigger guard.
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The Pacification Squad Sosigs, added in Update #62 (AKA Module 2 of the Return of the Rotweiners gamemode) use suppressed weapons (both MP5SD1s and suppressed versions of other weapons) fitted with visible laser sights, as seen in this rather awkward bit of CQC. The lasers would seem to run contrary to the purpose of the suppressors (although it could be argued that the Zosigs would be more attracted to gunshots than to red laser beams); this is simply in the name of balance, as being caught off-guard by a Pacification Squad patrol would likely mean near-instant death.
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The lasers seem to be activated by pressure switches (seeing as they're only active when being held), but yet neither pressure switches nor the actual lasers are visible on any of the weapons themselves; this MP5SD's laser apparently sees fit to instead just appear from the bottom of the handguard.

Heckler & Koch MP7A1

Another Sosiggun added in Update #85's first alpha build, the Heckler & Koch MP7A1 compliments the FN P90 as an armor-piercing SMG at the Sosigs' disposal.

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Heckler & Koch MP7A1 - 4.6x30mm
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The Sosiggun MP7A1, essentially the above .jpg image compressed horizontally.
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Most of it is here, though a few things are missing - the bolt release, the magazine release, the charging handle, small stuff like that.
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Among Sosigguns, the MP7A1 actually has rather decent irons.
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Celebrating this fact by ignoring them completely and doing some tracer-guided spraying.
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40 rounds later, the bolt locks open, indicating that you should probably let go of the grip button.

Heckler & Koch PSG-1

A Heckler & Koch PSG-1 in Sosiggun form was added in Update #99.

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Heckler & Koch PSG-1 - 7.62x51mm NATO
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Discovering that double-killing bosses is more achievable than he originally realized, Flaccid Steak decides to go on an akimbo boss-weapon collecting spree. Excluding the second boss, which we're... not gonna talk about.
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Upon attempting to aim one of his pilfered PSGs, Steak discovers that, somewhat disappointingly, the relevant boss's impressive accuracy is not indicative of a good-quality optic.
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As such, all he really has is a point-shootable battle rifle.
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And, once all its ammo is gone, it's nothing more than a neat-looking trophy. C'est la vie.

Heckler & Koch USP Match

The second alpha build of Update #85 added a Sosiggun variant of the Heckler & Koch USP Match, appearing occasionally on Sosigs in Take & Hold when playing as Operator Ori. The weapon's addition doesn't seem to have been intentional; apart from being absent from the alpha's patch notes, the weapon is rather evidently unfinished, capable of firing only a single shot and lacking a reciprocating/locking slide; sure enough, Alpha #4 fixed the weapon, making it properly function as a slide-cycling semi-auto.

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Heckler & Koch USP Match - .45 ACP
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"And just what do we have here?"
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Fortunately, flipping the non-gun-holding hand over allows for a view of the menu, and the filename of the gun in the gun-holding hand.
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Flipping over the gun-holding hand is a fair bit less useful.
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Looking through the "Sosiggun USPMatch"'s surprisingly useful sights...
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...and firing off a shot.
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Following this, the gun spends an uncomfortably long time returning from its fully-recoiled position, and... that's it. Seriously, the gun's completely useless at this point.
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"Man, this would be so much cooler if these things actually worked."
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"Oh, sweet, they do now."
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And indeed they do, albeit for a finite period of time. Hey, at least now you can tell.

Henry 1860

One of the Western Sosigguns added in Update #77 was a somewhat generic lever-action rifle, most closely resembling a Henry 1860.

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Henry 1860 - .44 Henry Rimfire
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The stubby repeater in all its glory; the distinctive receiver shape, coupled with the lack of a loading gate or handguard, peg this as a Henry.
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A pair of pilfered Henries, in case you were suspicious that the loading gate and handguard were just on the other side or something.
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Sights are modeled atop the barrel; however, the never-cocked hammer makes actually using them a fair bit trickier.
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Popping an unsuspecting Sosig in the dome...
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...then auto-cycling the other as the situation quickly becomes noticeably less dandy.
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One quick, frantic escape yields two empty rifles, and yet another failed attempt at an alternative site logo.
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A statue of Baron Porkington III in the Return of the Rotweiners gamemode (specifically, just outside the town of Weinerton) also features the rifle; while gold-colored and oversized, it is otherwise exactly the same, right down to the placement of the receiver pins.

IMI Desert Eagle

The second Sosiggun added in Update #70's 3rd alpha build was a .50 AE-chambered Desert Eagle.

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IMI/Magnum Research Desert Eagle Mark I - .357 Magnum
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Inspecting the stylized Desert Eagle. While the short barrel is somewhat reminiscent of the more recent L5 model, the lack of rails on its top indicates this to be a pre-Mark XIX variant, though whether it's a Mark I or a Mark VII can't be said for sure; the main distinguishing feature between the first two models is the shape of the safety lever, and the Sosig-wielded Deagles don't have one at all.
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Adding to the model confusion is the rear end of the slide, which seemingly implies the pistol to be striker-fired, and (likely by coincidence) somewhat resembles that of a Smith & Wesson M&P. Fitting for a handgun made famous by the movies to be shown at more cinematic angles than the rest, isn't it?
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Firing the Desert Eagle.
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Kicking a Sosig while it's down, with the aid of a few rounds of .50 AE.

IMI Micro Uzi

Prior to its addition in Update #54, the IMI Micro Uzi was, however, present in-game long before then, being featured on the icon for the "Spray & Pray" category in the M.E.A.T.S. (Modular Environment Adaptive Target Simulation) game mode. Good old backronyms.

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IMI Micro Uzi with bent trigger guard - 9x19mm Parabellum
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The "Spray & Pray" category's icon. Oddly, despite having as subtle a detail as appropriate compensator cuts in the muzzle, the weapon lacks a charging handle.

IMI Uzi

The full-size variant of the Uzi was added to H3 in the tenth alpha of Update #52, as an optional weapon for SWBs. According to its Sosiggun spawn menu name, it's chambered in .45 ACP, an available (though less common) option.

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IMI Uzi - 9x19mm Parabellum
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An Uzi-wielding bot belatedly realizes that he picked the wrong house.
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Getting a fair bit closer to an Uzi-wielding bot than is strictly advisable reveals the rather surprising level of detail it features: it has a charging handle, an ejection port, and even a modeled rear sight aperture, despite the fact that, as mentioned, nobody is meant to be getting this close to a bot for long enough to actually notice this. Meanwhile, one of the bot's incredibly bright tracers provides this shot with a bit more flair.
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Wounded and dazed, a Sosig drops its Uzi on the floor.
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Stealing the Uzi, and putting the poor thing out of its misery. The abnormally bright flash of light seen here is caused by the impact of an API (armor-piercing incendiary) round; this effect is part of the rebuild of tracers (and ballistics in general) that occurred in Update #59.
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Another part of this rebuild is the migration of enemy weapons over to the new tracer system, as demonstrated by this unwilling test subject. Note that, as with their MAC-11s, enemies' Uzis strangely fire from a closed bolt with a reciprocating charging handle; it's even stranger here than it is on the MAC, however, as the Uzi's charging handle doesn't reciprocate (a fact which, as the Micro Uzi above demonstrates, the developers were aware of).
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The updated Uzi; gone are the flat, matte-gray surfaces, along with the sights. And, while it's not visible here, the reciprocation of the charging handle.

M1918A2 Browning Automatic Rifle

Among the "mid-century" Sosigguns added in Update #77 was an M1918A2 Browning Automatic Rifle.

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M1918A2 Browning Automatic Rifle - .30-06 Springfield
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Inspecting the shrunken BAR. Note that the barrel terminates more or less at the gas port, similarly to the player-usable "Shorty" variant.
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The weapon's other side, alongside the left-hand wrist menu; note that the game is a bit inconsistent with the spelling of the word "Sosiggun".
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Aiming the BAR; the sights are relatively workable...
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...at least, they are until the weapon's considerable recoil obscures the target entirely. Note that, in addition to the bolt being closed, the charging handle reciprocates; this is inconsistent with how a normal BAR operates, but consistent with the rest of the Sosigguns.
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Speaking of things more consistent with the other Sosigguns than the actual weapon, the BAR locks open on empty; the charging handle locks back as well, since the bolt and charging handle are modeled as one component. Don't mind the Sosig lying on the floor; he's just taking a quick nap. Even if you can't see it behind the gun, his head is definitely still there. We will not be taking any further questions at this time.

M1 "Bazooka"

With the release of Update #85's first alpha came a new type of Sosiggun: a rocket launcher. More specifically, it is a stylized M1 "Bazooka", which can appear in the late stages of Take & Hold mode when playing the character "Grumbly GI Grayson". Because Sosigguns cannot be reloaded by the player, the Sosiggun rocket launcher comes with a "magazine" of four rockets, much like the Meat Fortress rocket launcher.

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M1 "Bazooka" - 2.36 inch rocket
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Taking a good, long look at the not-particularly-long (and, considering that it's based on the original M1, not-particularly-good) Sosig Bazooka.
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The launcher's opposite side (which is more or less identical to the first one shown), and the opposite side of the room (which is not at all identical to the first one shown).

Just to clarify, when I said "Sosig Bazooka", I meant that it's a Bazooka that Sosigs can use, not a Bazooka that fires whole Sosigs. Disappointing, I know.
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Fearing that the group of completely idle Sosigs may suddenly gain sentience and begin attacking, our paranoid rocketeer attempts to aim at them, only to find that the in-game Bazooka doesn't have any sights.
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Luckily for him, he's not at a distance where aiming is really necessary (especially not with a splash-damaging weapon); as such, all he needs to do is point and shoot.
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And, just like that, a future threat is now history.

M1 Carbine

Another member of the mid-century set from Update #77 was the M1 Carbine.

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M1 Carbine (Auto-Ordnance reproduction) - .30 Carbine
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The left side of the carbine...
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...and the right, as seen while pointedly refusing to acknowledge the Sosigs in the testing room.
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Aiming the carbine away from the aforementioned Sosigs; the pistol-like sights, while not consistent with the real steel (which used a post-and-aperture setup), they're still pretty nice.
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Turning back towards the Sosigs just to make a point of pretending they're not there, and breaking every known law of gun safety in the pursuit of pettiness. Note that the in-game rifle fires full-auto like an M2 Carbine; however, as it lacks a fire selector, it is still considered an M1.
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Holding the now-empty carbine, and observing its locked-open bolt. While M1 Carbines can lock open on empty, they only do so with 30-round magazines in them; once again, this is just a concession for the sake of gameplay (as otherwise there'd be no way to know if the gun was empty without pulling the trigger).

M1 Garand

Accompanying the M1 Carbine in Update #77's mid-century set of Sosigguns was the M1 Garand.

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M1 Garand - .30-06 Springfield
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The right side of a Sosig-issued Garand, in the "hands" of a player.
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And the left side, in the equally-airquoted "hands" of a Sosig.
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The bot fires its M1 at nothing in particular. The downward-facing arrows above its head indicate that it is being "suppressed" (i.e. forced/pressured down/into cover); again, there isn't much to cause this here. Well, no AI is perfect.
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Speaking of imperfect intelligences, an NI (natural intelligence) aims the Garand at a particularly threatening metal ball and yells at it to surrender.
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With the sphere having failed to drop a weapon and put its hands in the air, the NI responds in the only way it knows how.
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After 8 rounds of sphere-neutralizing .30-06 tracer ammo, the Garand runs empty; sadly, there's no pinging en-bloc clip to signify this. The locked-open bolt will have to do.

M134 Minigun

A Sosigun version of the M134 Minigun (separate from the Meat Fortress variant) was added in Update #99; like many such weapons, it was added primarily as a weapon for one of the bosses in the Flaccid Steak T&H gamemode.

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Airsoft handheld M134 Minigun - (fake) 7.62x51mm NATO
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Following a run that went... less successfully than he'd originally planned, Flaccid Steak inspects his ill-gotten minigun.
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Like the standard player-usable version, it has a GAU-17/A-style flash hider (albeit without actual holes); unlike the standard version, however, it doesn't have any obvious source of ammunition.
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Not that this stops it from spraying tracers like a fire hose, of course. Perfect for venting your frustrations in the score room.

M1A1 Thompson

Update #77's mid-century set's designated submachine gun was an M1A1 Thompson.

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M1A1 Thompson - .45 ACP
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Looking over a pair of pilfered Sosig Thompsons.
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Taking aim at a guard; the M1A1's notch-and-post sights are another unexpectedly usable set - moreso even than some of the actual guns in Grayson's loot pools.
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Gunning down another guard with a burst of .45 ACP.
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Sadly, that burst is all you'll get - the M1A1 Sosigguns have a conspicuous tendency to only have 3 or 4 rounds in them, likely to prevent them from being too useful to the player (and thus encouraging them to buy an actual SMG instead).

M242 Bushmaster

The aforementioned derelict Bradley IFVs also have M242 Bushmaster 25mm chainguns mounted on them; somewhat curiously, they lack their BGM-71 TOW missile launchers, though this could just be the result of damage sustained in the untold amount of time since the vehicles were actually used.

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M242 Bushmaster - 25x137mm
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The Bradley from earlier, uncomfortable with all the attention it's been getting, ducks its M242 downward and quietly mumbles something nobody can understand.

M26 Hand Grenade

The heater-style "Shield HandGrenade" features a painted-on design with 6 M26 hand grenades; these are apparently based on the one from the game's title art.

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M26 hand grenade
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The heater shield's spawner icon, complete with grenades. Unfortunately, the shield spawns facing the other way, so the design isn't immediately visible.

M2 Flamethrower

Added in the first alpha build of Update #85, higher-level Sosigs in Take & Hold mode on the "Grumbly GI Grayson" character preset can wield a Sosiggun variant of the M2 Flamethrower, modified to use a self-contained fuel supply tank; of course, this doesn't stop the Sosigs carrying them from wearing a fuel-tank backpack anyway, the sole apparent purpose of which is detailed below.

M2 Flamethrower
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The Sosiggun flamethrower in-game, looking not much bigger than the reference image above.
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It's also been, of course, substantially reworked; the single fuel tank at the front (which is presumably pressurized, since there aren't any other tanks associated with it) supplies both the main stream and what appears to be a pilot light at the muzzle. While functionally plausible, this does raise the question of why the rear section of the weapon even exists anymore. Stabilization, maybe?
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Sneaking up on a flamethrower-wielding Sosig, noting the more typical set of 3 tanks on its back.
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Shooting these tanks has, shall we say...
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...predictable consequences.
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Somehow-still-intact second flamethrower in hand, our hero fires at an enemy Sosig.
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This would ultimately prove to be a gross overestimation of the weapons' effective range and remaining fuel alike. Lifespan measured in seconds.

M60

Added in the third alpha of Update #70, the Sosigs' first dedicated support weapon is a stylized M60 machine gun, feeding from a fictional 50-round belt box; much to the ire of some, this came before the addition of a standard, player-usable version of the M60.

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M60 - 7.62x51mm NATO
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In the words of one YouTube commenter, "A living sausage gets to be Rambo before I do and I'm not sure how I feel about it".
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Well, at least it's here, in one form or another.
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Letting out an inarticulate scream of rage whilst blazing away with the squashed M60; it produces surprisingly little recoil for a 7.62mm general-purpose machine gun, likely in large part due to low rate of fire (and its weight).
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Somewhat more sensibly using an M60 mounted on a wall; while Sosigguns don't (and, due to their simplistic code-base, can't) have bipods, one can make do by pressing the forend into a short wall and pushing down and forward against the belt box.

M67 Hand Grenade

Another Sosig-wielded grenade added in Update #70's 3rd alpha build, stylized M67 hand grenades can be thrown by the aforementioned mustard-blooded soldiers, as well as the player themselves.

M67 hand grenade
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The ever-familiar baseball grenade, with a cartoony Sosig twist.
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As with all of their weapons, the Sosigs' grenades are simplified for the sake of large-scale performance; arming one consists of clicking on the pin...
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...and, depending on what angle you're holding it at, possibly giving the grenade a shake to get rid of the pin.
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Another sign of their simplicity is that, when thrown, the grenades' levers stay in place.
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Not that this stops them from exploding, of course.

M83 Smoke Grenade

Seeing as no set of grenades would be complete without a smoke bomb, the Sosigs got access to something more or less resembling an M83 smoke grenade in Alpha #3 of Update #70, albeit with a colorscheme more reminiscent of its predecessor, the AN/M8 HC smoke grenade.

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M83 smoke grenade
AN/M8 smoke grenade
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A spawnlocked smoke grenade, ready for hotboxing.
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Pulling (or rather, dropping) out the pin.
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Throwing the grenade...
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...and watching it obscure everything in the next room.

M84 Stun Grenade

Rounding out the Sosigs' collection of grenades from Update #70's third alpha build is an M84 stun grenade.

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M84 stun grenade
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Taking a look at a Sosig-wielded M84; of note is the blue paint on the entire middle section of the grenade (as opposed to the thinner band of paint on the real deal).
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Dropping out the pin. The M84 is, amusingly enough, the only grenade of the bunch where the standardized triangular pin of these simplified grenades would be appropriate, though a standard M84 (both in-game and in reality) is supposed to have 2 pins.
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Pitching the flashbang into Long A...
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...before getting yelled at for team-flashing. And referring to the next room as "Long A", despite it being neither particularly long nor particularly A.

MAC-11

Another Update #46 addition to the arsenals of SWBs is the MAC-11.

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RPB Industries M11A1 - .380 ACP
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A hapless MAC-wielding Weinerbot ambles into an objective in Take & Hold mode, clearly unaware of what awaits.
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Another bot prepares to meet an equally unfortunate end. It isn't entirely clear what the bot was hoping to accomplish with an uncocked, triggerless weapon.
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A Sosig with a menagerie of weapons, a MAC-11 among them.
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Grabbing the Sosig's MAC...
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...and firing it at nothing in particular. Unlike its normal counterpart, the MAC-11 used by bots is shown as closed-bolt, for whatever reason.
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A pair of bot-used MAC-11s.
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Shredding a Sosig with the submachine guns' absurd rate of fire.
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Of all the Sosigguns, the MAC-11 was easily the least changed (receiving little more than an update to its textures), probably in large part because it already looked like a flat-sided box to begin with.

Makarov PM

Another one of the sorta-Update #104 Sosigun set was a Makarov PM.

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Makarov PM - 9x18mm Makarov
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A pair of plastic PMs. Compared to the other Sosiguns' cartoonish appearance, these are relatively unaltered from their typical look - they even retain modeled (if not functional) hammers.
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Amusingly enough, they're also unique among Sosiguns in being larger than their real-steel counterparts.
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Accoringly, they also have larger sights, making them easier to aim at close range. This does hamper their precision somewhat, but then again, that was never really the point of a Sosigun. Or a regular Makarov, for that matter.
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Firing; even after this update's changes to Sosigun recoil (increased more or less across the board, to discourage their use as anything other than an emergency measure), the PM still doesn't jump too much.
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Oh, and about that hammer? Yeah... well, it was never gonna be perfect.

"Meatal Storm"

One of the five community-designed Sosigguns, the Meatal Storm is a squad automatic weapon based on the Metal Storm series (more specifically the 36-barreled "Bertha" technology demonstrator rig), with the trigger group and stock from a Milkor MGL; it has 15 barrels arranged in a 3x5 block, and fires 9mm projectiles at a downright ludicrous rate.

Metal Storm 36-barrel "Bertha" Rig - 9mm preloaded barrel
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Milkor MGL Mk 1S - 40x46mm
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The original concept for the Meatal Storm, for reference.
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Examining the finished product.
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Similar in nature, but a fair bit smaller; it also lacks the original concept's control panel and bipod.
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Aiming the Meatal Storm; while it lacks the concept gun's optic, it does have surprisingly useable irons.
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Not that it matters that much - the Meatal Storm is a spray-and-pray gun if there ever was one.
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Taking a look at the barrels; apart from showing how the final gun uses a 3-by-5 rectangle instead of a 4-by-4 square like the concept did, it also (when combined with the game's optional bullet trails) displays how the weapon works in-game - it fires one shot from each barrel in a row, moving downwards and restarting at the top in a repeating cycle. This further reduces the relevance of the irons, since the weapon isn't even shooting to the same point of aim within a shot, let alone between them.
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Enabling the trails also gives a better idea of the sort of effect that this weapon has - a quick burst can send a veritable storm of metal torrent of lead downrange, shredding anything unfortunate enough to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Mk 14 Mod 0 EBR

Yet another Sosiggun added in the first alpha of Update #85, the Mk 14 Mod 0 EBR fulfills the role of a DMR for the Sosigs. As with the FN F2000 above, it will most likely never receive a standard counterpart, with head developer Anton Hand describing the rifle simply as "heresy".

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Mk 14 Mod 0 Enhanced Battle Rifle with scope, vertical foregrip, and Harris bipod - 7.62x51mm NATO
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The Sosiggun Mk 14, on the other hand, comes with none of those things. Nor does it come with a trigger guard. Or a trigger.
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Or a charging handle.
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Being a designated marksman's rifle, it makes perfect sense to use the Mk 14 against enemies close enough to touch. Right?
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Once this philosophy has been applied twenty times, the rifle's bolt locks open, and it can be discarded.

Mk 2 Hand Grenade

Sosigs in Take & Hold mode will, when the "Grumbly GI Grayson" character is selected, use stylized Mk 2 hand grenades instead of their standard M67s.

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Mk 2 Hand Grenade
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Having gotten dunked into the floor by a surprisingly sneaky shotgun Sosig, Grayson takes a look at his two pilfered grenades in the round-summary room.
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Acting out of frustration more than anything else, he pops the pin out of one...
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...and throwing it at the physical manifestation of all of his failures.
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Seeing as the scoreboard is not, in fact, actually physical, this accomplishes very little.

MK3A2 Offensive Hand Grenade

The enemies of the "Welldone Freemeat" Take & Hold character also use special grenades; like the rest of the character's items and enemies, they are based on the "M83" grenades from Half-Life 2, which were in turn based on the MK3A2 Offensive Hand Grenade.

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MK3A2 Offensive Hand Grenade
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Having crowbarred his way through enemies with far tougher armor than he was anticipating, Welldone Freemeat takes a look at his prize. In case you haven't guessed, it's a re-colored version of the basic smoke/incendiary Sosig grenades.
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They are not, however, merely a cosmetic reskin of the other Sosig frag grenades; like HL2's hand grenades, they feature a blinking red LED and a small beeping speaker (a fact which some of the enemies occasionally joke about).
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Throwing the grenade...
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...and watching the inevitable consequence thereof.

MPS AA-12 CQB

The fourth and final Sosiggun added in Update #70's 3rd alpha is an MPS AA-12 CQB; for balance reasons, it does slightly less damage than their cut-down Remington 870s, being more akin to a 20-gauge shotgun than a 12-gauge one.

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MPS AA-12 CQB - 12 gauge
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D'aww...
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Sure, "adorable" isn't normally a word used to describe a fully-automatic shotgun, but damn if it can't be an appropriate one.
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Hipfiring the AA-12; given its size, it's impressive that even this much of it is actually visible. Far more visible is the fact that yes, even the Sosig shotguns fire tracers.
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Blasting a Sosig, which shows off the firing process better; this also shows that, unlike a real AA-12 (and, for that matter, the player-usable AA-12 in-game), the Sosigs' AA-12s have reciprocating charging handles.

Over/Under Shotgun

The standard item spawner instruction panel icon for break-action weapons is a garden-variety Over/Under Shotgun (different from the Beretta DT11 usable in-game), albeit somewhat strangely lacking any sort of trigger.

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Browning 5.25 O/U - 12 gauge
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Well, a fat lot of good that's gonna do you.

PKM

One of the Sosiguns first made accessible in Update #104 was a PKM (much to the chagrin of the people who'd wanted a normal version).

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PKM (with later-pattern flash hider) - 7.62x54mmR
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Examining the PKM.
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Not quite the real deal, but as close as you're gonna get for a while.
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Aiming at a wall; the sights are, like most of the later-added Sosiguns', rather clean and usable.
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Firing off a couple rounds. The block to the right is the feed opening, showing the clear lack of the belted ammunition this would normally require; this is largely handwaved by Sosiguns' cartoonish, toy-like nature, though if an actual mechanism had to be ascribed to it, it would presumably just be an odd square drum feeding in through the bottom of the receiver or something.
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And yes, while the lack of a normal, fully-functional PKM is lamentable, the ability of the Sosigun variant to do this does offer at least some consolation.
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After a considerable amount of dakka, the squashed GPMGs both run empty; in typical Sosigun fashion, they are shown firing from a closed bolt, with reciprocating charging handles that lock back when the last round is fired - none of these are features of a real PKM, but then again, neither is essentially anything in this image. Nor is it meant to be.

"Pocket Toaster"

One of the five community-designed Sosigguns, the Pocket Toaster is a sidearm that appears at a glance to be a standard sci-fi laser pistol. However, according to the design submission, it actually fires a super-heated, high-velocity, armor-penetrating 1.6mm projectile, hence the name "Pocket Toaster."

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The original concept for the Pocket Toaster (built out of Legos), for reference.
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The in-game model of the Pocket Toaster - similar, but smoother.
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Also, instead of relying on friction, the in-game Pocket Toaster is held together with screws that are rather clearly armorer-only.
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Aiming at a Sosig; the Toaster combines a fully-hooded front post (relatively typical for a rifle, but rather unusual for a handgun) with a fully-hooded rear notch (which is typical for more or less nothing).
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Putting a 1.6mm hole in said Sosig; note the unique red muzzle flash. The alpha build that introduced this pistol added a glowing red impact decal, though it wasn't used for anything at the time; presumably, this was one of its intended recipients. It also introduced an M3 Trench Knife, seen in the wielder's off-hand here.
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After 7 more of those, the Toaster locks open. The lack of the slide's distinct "beep" upon returning to battery makes this more obvious, especially considering how long it takes the slide to do so.
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Luckily, this alpha also added a new feature to certain scenes: holstering a Sosiggun and waiting for a sufficient period of time allows it to auto-reload. This was later removed (largely because it completely broke the balancing in certain modes), replaced with an option (only enabled in certain scenes) to reload them via vigorous shaking.
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Demonstrating the penetrative power of the Pocket Toaster, and shooting a Sosig through a wall; there are more impressive ways to demonstrate this, but that's hindsight talking.

PP-91 Kedr

Yet another Sosigun that was only meaningfully added to the game in Update #104 was the PP-91 Kedr.

PP-91 Kedr - 9x18mm Makarov
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Examining a pair of Sosigun Kedrs. Like many other folding-stocked Sosiguns, their stocks remain folded at all times, likely to keep them smaller and prevent them from getting caught on things (due to the somewhat odd, purely physical way in which Sosigs move and carry weapons).
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Aiming one of the SMGs at a wall; curiously, the front sight is absent, so the front sight protective wings have to be lined up with the rear sight instead, using the empty space between as an ersatz front post.
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Though, with how hard these things are to control in full-auto, and the presence of tracers, precise aiming isn't that important anyway. Like other weapons using Russian calibers, the Kedr's tracers are green.
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Upon running empty, the Kedrs' bolts lock open, signifying that their usefulness has come to an end.

"Pulse Rifle"

The higher-tier enemies of the "Welldone Freemeat" Take & Hold character carry cartoonishly-stylized versions of Half-Life 2's "Pulse Rifle"; since Sosigguns lack secondary firemodes, the original weapon's dark energy ball launcher is absent, and they are effectively just high-powered, slow-firing battle rifles gameplay-wise.

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Half-Life 2's "Pulse Rifle", for comparison.
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Take the gun above, squash it a bit, and there you go.
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It still has the large crescent-shaped pulse-plug holder, though this isn't usable on player-acquired Pulse Rifles due to the standard mechanics of Sosigguns.
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Aiming at a wall; unlike the original, the Sosig variant of the Pulse Rifle lacks iron sights (not that the original's were usable anyway).
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Fortunately, the bright tracers and equally bright impact decals make walking your shots in on a target a fair bit easier.
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Once they're empty, the roughly oval-shaped reciprocating component around what is presumably the Pulse Rifle's barrel locks back, signifying that it's no longer useful (on a sidenote, this is incorrect, as the actual reciprocating component on Half-Life 2's Pulse Rifle is a small, hammer-like object that strikes the pulse plug). At least, not unless you have a physics-testing tool of some sort...

Remington 1866 Derringer

Another one of Update #77's Western-themed Sosigguns is a Derringer, most closely resembling a Remington 1866 Derringer. Like several other weapons in this set, it was released before a player-usable counterpart was.

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Remington 1866 Derringer - .41 rimfire
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Inspecting the Derringer. While there are several different handguns like this, the shape of the front sight makes the most likely candidate a Remington.
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Though, granted, details might be a bit off here or there, if the missing hammer didn't clue you in.
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Also, if you were planning on actually using said front sight, you're fresh out of luck.
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Attempting to engage a Sosig from about ten times the reasonable effective range of such a weapon; even if this were a hit, a follow-up would probably be needed, since the 5th alpha build of Update #85 changed these from firing .32 ACP to .25 ACP, largely to reduce the degree to which players could be nickel-and-dimed to death early on.
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Upon emptying a derringer, it does this; it's presumably supposed to be flipped muzzles-up about the top of the frame (like its real-steel counterpart) rather than sideways, given the clipping between the frame and the barrel. Well, such things happen in the land of code.

Remington 870

Yet another SWB-usable weapon added in Update #46 is a sawn-off Remington 870. A full-length 870 with an extended magazine tube is also used as the item spawner's instruction panel image for pump-action shotguns.

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Remington 870 (sawn-off) - 12 gauge
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A Weinerbot in a rather awkward standoff with the player. Note that its 870's pump handle is pulled to the rear; Weinerbots' weapons actually have moving parts. It's almost like you're actually supposed to get close to them or something...
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Examining the left side of the enemies' low-poly 870 (in "Sosiggun" form)...
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...and the right side of a different one.
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Firing the cut-off 870.
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What follows is a pumping sequence that would seem a lot more normal were it not for the fact that this weapon is only being held with one hand; presumably in order to keep its behaviors simple enough to maintain the Sosigguns' low performance costs, the pump simply cycles itself automatically upon firing.
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*record scratch*
*freeze frame*
"Yup, that's me. You're probably wondering how I wound up in this situation."
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The updated, rubberized 870 Sosiggun. Not much has changed, apart from the addition of a couple of pins and some very widely-spaced pump handle serrations.
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Remington 870 Hardwood Home Defense - 12 gauge
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As the Rapture slowly takes away a Mossberg 590A1, the static icon of an 870 looks on in approval.

Remington Model 700 VTR

While not physically present in-game, a Remington Model 700 VTR with a bipod appears on the item spawner's instruction panel as an example of a bolt-action rifle.

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Remington Model 700 VTR - .308 Winchester
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The M700 VTR on the instruction panel. Note the affixed bipod; it appears that the image above was used as a reference.

RG-6

The most powerful of the sorta-Update #104 Sosigun set was an RG-6 grenade launcher.

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RG-6 - 40mm VOG caseless
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Inspecting a pair of RG-6 Sosiguns; both sides are more or less identical, so the use of two was, in hindsight, a bit redundant. Oh well.
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Aiming the launcher; the majority of the sight leaf's notches have been removed, while the lowest has been extended across the middle to form a solid bar, the result effectively being an aperture sight with a giant silly window above it.
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Firing; the Sosigun recoil rework (and collapsed stock) certainly don't help with the weapon's considerable kick, though the main culprit is the fact that, upon introduction, the RG-6's foregrip didn't actually work, forcing the user to fire it one-handed.
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And, at that point, you might as well just go all in and jump the shark completely.

Sawn-off Double Barreled Shotgun

Bandits in the Wurstworld scene often make use of Sawn-off Double Barreled Shotguns; between their stylized, low-detail nature, and the already-present lack of distinct identifying features on most side-by-side shotguns makes any sort of positive ID more or less impossible. A sawn-off SBS in Sosiggun form was one of the Western-themed Sosigguns added in Update #77.

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Sawn-off Remington Spartan - 12 gauge
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Menaced by an approaching lawman, a bandit-bot fires its sawn-off.
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Both shots missing, the bot attempts a quick reload.
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Not quite quick enough.
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Enraged after witnessing the death of his brother Single-Shotgun Sammy, Double-Double-Barrel Darrell charges at the deputy, firing wildly...
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...and just as quickly meets his end, clutching his triggerless shotguns in his nonexistent hands as bits of his head and packets of SAUCE (Standardized American Universal Currency Equivalent) litter the ground. The Shotgun Brothers' reign of terror had finally come to an end.
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A tableful of Sosigguns; the sawn-off shotgun is visible to the left.
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A hallway full of one Sosiggun; the sawn-off's left is visible to the center.
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And to the center is the right.
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"Aiming" the sawn-off; while it has substantially more features than the original one (a stamped trigger guard, a distinct action plate, etc.), it still doesn't have any sights, so this is more a matter of point-and-shoot than anything else.
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Firing one shell creates instant bedlam.
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Conversely, the only thing that comes from firing the other shell is a broken-open shotgun, never to be reloaded. Unless an enemy picks it up, of course - it's the least that could be done for them, considering the rather one-sided nature of the weapon-stealing mechanic.

ShAK-12

Yet another Sosigun "added" in Update #104 was a ShAK-12; it is known as the "Ash12" internally, referencing the prototype variant of the ShAK, the ASh-12.7. Notably, it appears to have been built off of the Sosigs' AA-12 to some extent; while it functions as a rifle, it shares the squashed AA-12's semi-automatic fire and 12-round capacity, and makes shotgun shell clattering noises when shaken (as opposed to the brass clinking sounds used by rifles).

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ShAK-12 with vertical foregrip - 12.7x55mm
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Examining the Sosigs' ShAK-12; the round-backed pistol grip and charging handle shape are the primary details that distinguish it as a ShAK, rather than the earlier ASh.
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The foregrip suggests that this was based on the gun in the reference image, though it has a 10-round magazine (visually; Sosiguns often have non-standard magazine capacities due to balancing concerns and general cartoonishness) rather than that gun's 20-rounder.
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Aiming; due to the considerably shortened front end, the front sight no longer exists, so a new one has been added to the inside of the carrying handle; the resulting sight picture is clear, if not terribly precise.
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The weapon's impressive recoil doesn't exactly help in this regard. This may be one of the reasons (aside from what it shares with the AA-12 Sosigun) that it can't go full-auto; if it could, it would simultaneously be near-impossible to use and extremely easy for enemies to kill the player with.
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11 more shots and one less lock later, the ShAK restores balance to the universe by bringing in a lock of its own.

SIG-Sauer M17

Update #105's "Operator" Sosigs wield various current-gen SIG-Sauer weapons; accordingly, their sidearm is the SIG-Sauer M17.

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SIG-Sauer XM17 - 9x19mm Parabellum

SIG-Sauer MCX Rattler

The standard weapon for the lightest and fastest of the three "Operator" Sosigs is the SIG-Sauer MCX Rattler, fitted with a (functionless) Aimpoint ACRO-esque red-dot sight.

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SIG-Sauer MCX Rattler SBR - .300 AAC Blackout

SIG-Sauer MCX-SPEAR

The middle-of-the-road "Operator" Sosigs wield SIG-Sauer MCX-SPEARs, fitted with suppressors and (non-functional) LPVOs.

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SIG-Sauer MCX-SPEAR with SLX68-MG-QD suppressor - 6.8x51mm FURY

SIG-Sauer MG 338

The heaviest of the "Operator" Sosigs use SIG-Sauer MG 338s, fitted with red-dot sights, magnifiers, and suppressors; of these attachments, only the latter is actually functional in-game.

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SIG-Sauer MG 338 with suppressor and red-dot sight - .338 Norma Magnum

Smith & Wesson Model 10

The Smith & Wesson Model 10 is featured on the main menu's icon for the Sampler Platter scene (which is a combination steakhouse/shooting range, with the former having been accidentally destroyed by a gas leak.)

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Smith & Wesson Model 10 - .38 Special
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The Model 10 on the aforementioned icon.

Smith & Wesson Model 29

A 8 3/8" Smith & Wesson Model 29 appears as the icon for the "Lightning Reflexes" category in the M.E.A.T.S gamemode, and a 6" version appears as the item spawner's instruction panel as an example for a double-action revolver.

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Smith & Wesson Model 29 with 8 3/8" barrel - .44 Magnum
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The 8 3/8" Model 29 appearing as the icon for the Lightning Reflexes category...
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Smith & Wesson Model 29 with 6" barrel - .44 Magnum
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...and the 6" version as the item spawner's example for a double-action revolver.

Springfield Model 1873 Cavalry Carbine

Yet another weapon in Update #77's western-themed Sosiggun set is a Springfield Model 1873 Cavalry Carbine, also known as the "Trapdoor" carbine; this was another weapon in the set added before a player-usable version.

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Springfield Model 1873 Cavalry Carbine - .45-70 Government
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Holding the shrunken Springfield. While the Sosig weapons are nearly all shortened at the front, the fact that the forestock ends before the barrel does identifies this as a true carbine, rather than a squashed rifle.
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A pair of Trapdoors in the halls of Take & Hold; these start showing up on supply point guards after the first hold phase.
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Aiming one of the carbines at a remarkably imposing wall.
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Firing the other one at something a bit more threatening. Note how the hammer is all the way back here; the Sosiggun Trapdoors are shown as double-action.
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Two expended .45-70 rounds equals two empty carbines, whose emptiness is indicated by... not much, really.
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Except, of course, when it is; the Springfield's double-action behavior was later amended to the correct single-action.

Standard Manufacturing DP-12

The last of the modern Sosigguns added in Update #85's first alpha was the Standard Manufacturing DP-12; as with the FN F2000 and Mk 14 Mod 0 EBR, the DP-12 will likely not get any implementation beyond this, as its dual-tube magazine setup would require a substantial re-work of most of the game's core firearm code to work.

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Standard Manufacturing DP-12 - 12 gauge
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The Sosiggun DP-12 in all its squashed glory. Here's a shot of the right side...
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...and here's an entirely reasonable response to Windows corrupting your shot of the left side.
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Entirely failing to hit a Sosig with the DP-12; as with the 870, the DP-12's pump cycles itself, though it (correctly) only does so every other shot.
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Also like the 870, the DP-12's pump stays back on the last shot, to indicate that it was, in fact, the last shot.

Steyr Scout

Update #52's 10th alpha gave SWBs the ability to use Steyr Scout rifles. They boast high damage, accuracy, and range, offset by their low fire rates and capacities. This was one of the few Sosig weapons that did not have any player-usable equivalent, until Update #84 when a player-dedicated Scout was finally added.

Steyr Scout - 7.62x51mm NATO
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A bot with a rather comically proportioned Scout wanders into a Hold Point, and begins to wonder if this is really the best weapon for close-quarters combat against a lunatic with a sawn-off Sten and a SPAS-12 loaded with high-explosive shells.
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A enemy's Scout on the ground.
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Picking it up, just in time to meet an enemy Sosig whose enthusiasm greatly outstrips its preparedness. Lifespan measured in seconds.
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Aiming at another helpless enemy; note that, unlike the Scouts used by the Weinerbots, the Sosigs' Scouts lack scopes, likely to avoid having to program such a complex function into a weapon meant to be simple and cheap (from a performance standpoint, that is).
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Putting the downed Sosig out of its misery reveals something else of note: much like their sawn-off Remington 870s, the Sosigs' Scouts have self-cycling bolts; again, this is meant to keep the weapons as simple as possible.
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Charging a Scout-wielding Sosig, its complete and utter failure to aim showing off how their rifles are also self-cycling. Which makes sense, when you think about it - they are, after all, the same guns, regardless of who's using them.
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The Sosig's failure to aim also has other effects, namely on the distance between its head and the rest of its body.
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The updated Scout model; following the Law of Conservation of Trigger Guards, adding a trigger guard to the MP5SD1 required removing one from the Scout. Presumably.

"StG20 Nachtigal"

One of the five community-designed Sosigguns, the StG20 Nachtigal is essentially just a bullpup Chauchat in a modern chassis; it does notably feature components from several other guns, including the pistol grip from a Steyr AUG, the barrel/front sight/stacking rod of a Sturmgewehr 44, and perhaps most bafflingly, the Lange-Visier rear sight from a Mauser Gewehr 98.

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Chauchat Mle. 1915 - 8x50mmR Lebel
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Steyr AUG A1 - 5.56x45mm NATO
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Sturmgewehr 44 - 7.92x33mm Kurz
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Mauser Gewehr 98 - 7.92x57mm Mauser
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The original concept for the StG20 Nachtigal.
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The StG20's final form - similar, but squashed somewhat.
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Still the same major features are all present, right down to the holey magazines (the rounds in which, being a fixed part of the model, never deplete).
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Aiming through the Lange-Visier rear sight makes it seem even stranger than before; for whatever reason, the rear and front sights have been merged, making the actual sight picture a reversed aperture setup instead of the expected notch and hooded post.
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Blasting a Sosig with a for-some-reason-green tracer; note the reciprocating charging handle, which apparently takes the place of the original Chauchat's rather undesirable cheek-weld position (on the back end of the receiver tube) as a means of beating up the user's face.

TOZ-106

The sole shotgun in the pseudo-Update #104 Sosigun set was the TOZ-106, in keeping with the set being generally patterned after Escape from Tarkov.

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TOZ-106 - 20 gauge
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Examining a pair of TOZes. (TOZs? TOZi? Just TOZ?)
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Aiming the TOZ-106; it features a simple set of notch-and-post irons, like the real deal.
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Firing off a shell. Unlike the player-usable version, the Sosig TOZ sidesteps the whole "can't fire with the stock folded" issue by simply not having one.
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The immediate aftermath of a somewhat underwhelming attempt at breaching a door; like the other Sosig bolt-actions, the bolt simply cycles itself.
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Accordingly, it also locks open on its own once the magazine is emptied (a process which somehow takes 10 shots); note how the bolt channel in the receiver has been widened to allow the bolt to cycle without turning - to let them use as much simple, common code as possible, a Sosigun can only really have one moving component, and it can only move along one path/arc.

Unknown AR-15 Carbine

The wooden hot dog soldier targets (yes, you read that right) seen in certain scenes are drawn with somewhat generic, hard-to-identify AR-15-pattern carbines. The item spawner's tutorial/example image for closed-bolt, magazine-fed firearms also features a simplistic-looking AR to illustrate the various controls involved in any such weapon's operation.

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Colt Model 723 - 5.56x45mm NATO. Similar to the rifles in-game.
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"Well, this is awkward..."
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Fortunately, the Operator's special training allows him to neutralize all 3 targets in mere seconds, narrowly escaping the threat of unwanted social interaction.
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The item spawner's carbine, seen here as a rather strange demonstration of how to use an MP5K.

Unknown Lever-Action Rifle

Weinerbots in the Wurstworld scene will occasionally use lever-action rifles; they're a bit too generic for a positive ID to be made, though they most closely match the 1955-vintage Winchester Model 88.

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Winchester Model 88 - .243 Winchester
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Suddenly faced with a close-quarter standoff, a bandit-bot quickly reloads its rifle.
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It then takes aim...
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...and dies of natural causes. Note the Model 88-esque single-piece stock.
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Another bot, with another Winchester. While it's a bit hard to tell, at full size it can be seen that the bots do, in fact, work their rifles' actions. The white hexagon towards the bottom of the shot is one of the bots' bullets, which travel at a rather leisurely pace in comparison to player-fired projectiles.

Unknown Revolver

Various bandit-bots in the Wurstworld scene wield large, stylized, low-detail revolvers, vaguely resembling the Colt Single Action Army; unlike the SAA, however, their revolvers are double-action, and feature swing-out cylinders.

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Colt Single Action Army (Cimarron reproduction) - .45 Long Colt
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Confronted with a charging player, a bandit-bot quickly reloads its pair of revolvers. Note that, as with many instances of akimbo revolvers in games, the cylinders swing out in opposite directions.
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The bandit tries to defend itself with some comically slow-moving bullets...
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...which, in the end...
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...doesn't end well for old Mr. Moneyhead.

Winchester Model 1887

Rounding out the Western set of Update #77's Sosigguns was a sawn-off Winchester Model 1887 shotgun. The item spawner's instruction panel also features a cut-down 1887 to demonstrate its controls.

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Sawn-off Winchester Model 1887 (Norinco reproduction) - 12 gauge
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A pair of Prospectors (one of the new Sosig types introduced in Update #77, which show up in Return of the Rotweiners); these enemies use a variety of weapons from various bygone eras, sawn-off Model 1887s among them.
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Examining a pair of the twice-shortened shotguns.
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They're more or less completely symmetrical, so this shot would've been redundant even if there weren't already two in the first shot.
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Aiming; like most of the Sosig shotguns, the 1887s lack sights, so this is more point-shooting than anything else.
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As such, Sosig shotguns are some of the only in-game weapons that about as practical to dual-wield as they are to use normally.
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Plus, you get to watch two levers cycle themselves at once instead of just one.
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One of the other pluses of dual-wielding Sosigguns is that it doubles the amount of the ammo you have on hand; once they lock open like this, they're pretty much useless, so every shot counts.

Winchester Model 1897

Likewise, the final weapon in Update #77's mid-century set was a Winchester Model 1897 shotgun, in (most of) its famous "Trench Gun" configuration.

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Winchester Model 1897 "Trench Gun" - 12 gauge
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The Sosig-wielded Winchester. While the heat shield has apparently taken a hike, enough of the bayonet lug is left to confirm the shotgun's identity.
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Several other things are missing as well; in particular, the trigger, hammer, and most of the receiver pins were lost in the stylizing process. At least the curiously round-edged ejection port is still here.
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Pointing the shotgun at a wall; there are no sights to speak of, not even a front bead lie a normal 1897, so calling this "aiming" would be a bit of a stretch.
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Then again, the target in question is a wall a few feet ahead, and the weapon in question is a tracer-firing shotgun, so aiming isn't exactly necessary.
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Waiting patiently for the little fairies inside the action to run the pump handle back and forth...
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...only to find that, as the weapon has run empty, there will be no forth.

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